Funny Baseball Quotes
by Aron Wallad
- "A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings." Earl Wilson
- "When they start the game, they don't yell, "Work ball." They say, "Play ball."" Willie Stargell
- "When we played softball, I'd steal second base, feel guilty and go back." Woody Allen
- "There have been only two geniuses in the world. Willie Mays and Willie Shakespeare." Tallulah Bankhead
- "With the money I'm making, I should be playing two positions." Pete Rose
- "Andre Dawson has a bruised knee and is listed as day-to-day. Aren't we all?" Vin Scully
- "Finish last in your league and they call you Idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you Doctor." Abe Lemons
- "The doctors x-rayed my head and found nothing." Dizzy Dean
- "I managed a team that was so bad we considered a 2-0 count on the batter a rally." Rich Donnelly, minor league manager
- "Let no one accuse baseball of not being tough on drugs. During his baseball career, Steve Howe was given 7 lifetime suspensions." Bill Ferraro, baseball fan.
- "I could never play in New York. The first time I came into a game there, I got into the bullpen car and they told me to lock the doors." Mike Flanagan, Baltimore Orioles
- "On his own scouting report: "Very deceptive. Slower than he looks." Joe Garagiola
- "A lot of things run through your head when you're going in to relieve in a tight spot. One of them was, 'Should I spike myself?'" Lefty Gomez
- "Three more saves and he ties John the Baptist." Hank Greenwald, on Bruce Sutter